What It's All About

So many of us spend  much of our young lives waiting or looking to find Mr. Right. Some may have already found them and others are right now wallowing in melancholy because the person they thought was the one wasn't.

I've been through the whole rigmarole myself. I was always in the "it-might-be-you" mode with every relationship. The end of each botched attempt found me thinking I was destined to a life filled with drunken nights and crying myself to sleep. I tried frantically to get a grip on my life and to find out what kept going wrong. I finally figured it out… well, sort of and I relaxed. I stopped worrying and just kept the faith.

Then God finally gave me what I'd been asking for so long, from someone I'd never expected to come back into my life in that way. And now, everything's just perfect.

By perfect, I don't mean that our life and our relationship is without flaws. We have our squabbles and we can grate each other's nerves sometimes, we fight and have our little cold wars. But our kind of perfect simply suits us. I love him and he loves me… warts and all.

Whatever our reasons are for being with someone, we should be sensible enough to accept that it's not all wine and roses or chocolate and jewelry. We shouldn't allow ourselves to be swept away by all the exhilaration of falling in love, of having our first & last call, or text message, of the day, the conversations over dinner, a confidante to share our woes with, someone who fills the emptiness we feel.  If we believe that is what it's all about then… good luck.

Marriage has changed my perspective on a lot of things. I know now that love is real even without the chocolates & flowers, the candlelight dinners & marathon lovemaking… or through the arguments & mood swings, the stinking farts (ututino!) and morning breath… or with the kisses and hugs and the taking me to the ER at 1 am 'coz I'm having an asthmatic bout or getting up at noon after doing night duty just to cook for me 'coz I'm too lazy to get up and do it myself.

For me, that's what it's all about. That's love.