Grateful

One of the good things that has come out of the recent disaster brought about by Super Typhoon Haiyan to our countrymen in Central Visayas is the overwhelming support that has poured in from all over the globe.

I can't help but get teary-eyed with gratitude and joy to realize that the Philippines isn't alone. There are so many heartwarming stories of random people, including children, who generously share what they have, stage fundraising events in their communities, give unexpected hugs and words of encouragement to Filipinos they meet on their way, and give us shoutouts on the web, telling us that we're all in this together.

And there's the official relief assistance, including logistic equipment and manpower, being sent over by countries such as the USA, Australia, Canada, Japan, United Kingdom, France, Korea and so many more. They're helping deliver food, water and medical care to the survivors as well aiding in clearing operations.

Philippines International Typhoon Response in pictures. More HERE.

FAiTH Report

Despite our differences in faith, politics, culture and status, it's amazing at how everyone has managed to set all that aside to respond to a common goal: to HELP another who is in need. And that restores my faith in humanity. 

THANK YOU, WORLD!

Mood Music: Unity by Shinedown

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Until we meet again

"All Is Well" by Henry Scott Holland

We all knew that Papa's time with us was limited once he was diagnosed with stage 3 liver cancer last February but none of us were prepared to suddenly lose him without warning last Sunday, September 23. He actually "survived" until Tuesday but it was only through the aid of medications and a ventilator but the husbo and I knew he wasn't really there anymore. The family just needed Papa to hold on until J arrived from overseas so he could say his goodbye.

For the seven years that I was blessed to know Papa, I saw a man who loved his family above everyone and everything else except God. I never saw him angry nor heard him say anything bad about anyone. He was jolly, quirky, makulit, generous and kindhearted. He loved food. He never stopped dreaming. And his faith in our Lord never wavered.

I am crying as I'm writing this. I'm crying for the loss of someone I came to love dearly and to respect immensely. I'm crying for my husband who has lost his wonderful, loving father; for my mother-in-law who has lost her love and lifetime partner; for my boys who will never truly know one of the men I would've wanted them to emulate when they grow up, and whose love would've helped shelter, strengthen and comfort them through life.

To borrow words from Jimi Hendrix's The Story of Life:

The story of life
is quicker than
the wink of an eye,
The story of love
is hello and goodbye,
Until we meet again.

See you on the other side, Papa. We love you. <3


Mood Music: The End of the End by Paul McCartney

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His second name is "Sugar"

Yesterday morning when I brought Jeolo to school, his K1 teacher told me of what happened in her class the day before.

The kids' break time had just finished but most of them refused to settle down even after she repeatedly asked them to go back to their seats. The boys were especially rowdy while the girls chatted with their friends. She suddenly felt a bit overwhelmed and sat down on her desk while staring at her class. Jeolo stood up and approached her.

J: "Teacher Rica, what's wrong?"
TR: "I want to go home, Jeolo."
J: "Why, Teacher Rica?"
TR: "Because I have a headache."
J: "I'll give you a hug."

And he went and gave her a hug. Then, Jeolo asked:

"Tighter?"

She said she couldn't help but laugh and be touched. :)

I have the sweetest and most sensitive little boy. I'm very blessed. <3 

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falling in love for the third time

Two weeks ago, on August 24, I had another prenatal checkup with my OB. She saw me at around quarter to one in the afternoon and after doing an internal exam, we found out I was dilated by 2cm. She sent me home to get my stuff and asked me to return ASAP for admission.

By 3pm, I was in the labor room. I'd started to feel mild contractions but didn't really expect it to progress very quickly since it took me 20 hours before my firstborn came out four years ago.

But by 4:30, my contractions became stronger and came closer together. After that, everything seemed to whiz by in a haze of pain and by 6:10 that evening, the newest addition to our family was born.

I'm pretty much zombified at this point but I'm not complaining. I've fallen in love again and having three wonderful men in my life is just awesome.

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my baby's tears

My little boy is very close to his Tita Cake (it's actually Kate but he insists on calling her "Cake"). She was his unofficial yaya during the first four months of his life. She was there in the delivery room with me when I gave birth to him. She was the one who gave him his baths because her long fingers and experience working in the nursery made the procedure look so easy. On those days when I was near out of my mind from exhaustion and lack of sleep, she took care of him without complaint.

When she decided to work in the same hospital where J works in Riyadh, it was a blessing because Jeolo had someone else to visit him, play with him and, unfortunately, spoil him. They'd play so roughly that you'd think Jeolo would end up crying all the time but he, in fact, enjoyed every moment of it. He clearly adored his Tita and always looked forward to seeing her.

Since we came back home a few months ago, he's had to deal with being separated from his Dada twice already. He actually came home to QC for about two weeks last May, just a month after we left Riyadh, to be with us. Good thing he timed his return to the MidEast to coincide with my sister's arrival for her annual vacation so it helped buffer my son's sadness and longing for his dad.

But today, the inevitable end to her vacation began and she left for Manila at noon for her flight back overseas on Friday. We didn't expect him to cry as much as he did when she said goodbye earlier. It was so hard to see him bawling and calling for her to come back. None of us had really expected it but almost everyone teared up because it was heartbreaking to listen to our original baby asking his favorite aunt not to go. :c

I can't help but wonder what effect these separations from the people he loves will do to him in the long run. All I can hope for is that I'll be able to provide him with all the love and support he needs to deal with these experiences for now.

Mood Music: Next Year by Foo Fighters

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Top that!

I recently wrote about Jeolo's new book, Guess How Much I Love You, and answering it immediately turned into a game for him.

This evening, he managed to best the final answer of "I love you right up to the moon and back." His retort? "I love you up to the SUN!" :h

Photo Credit

Mood Music: Butterfly Wings by Owl City

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my bee turns three

You bring us immeasurable joy just by being. 

We love you so much, baby boy. More than life itself.

Happy Birthday!

Mood Music: Rock-a-Bye Heart by Steve Holy

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the sweetest thing

Every time we pass by a flower shop, my son never fails to nag his Dada about buying me flowers. He'll excitedly say, "Dada, buy Mama flowers!" I think he latched on to the idea last June when J gave me a bunch of roses for our anniversary.

Yesterday evening, while we were at the supermarket, he saw a flower shop while we were going in and again repeated the same words to his dad. Thus, before we left, J went inside the shop and got one red rose. He then gave it to my son who, in turn, gave it to me followed by a wet, sloppy kiss and an "I love you". :L

I do hope that he'll remain as sweet and as thoughtful as he is now when he's all grown up.

Mood Music: Sweet Child O' Mine by Capital Children's Choir

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my kilig fix for today

I just can't help it, I have to post this video. It literally has made my day.

The guy is Iker Casillas, team captain and goalkeeper of this year's FIFA World Cup champion, Spain. The reporter is his girlfriend, Sara Carbonero. According to one YouTube user, who gave a rough translation of the interview, Iker was thanking the people who've stood by him through it all - his parents, his brother - but choked up when he was about to mention her. She tried to tell him something like, "don't worry, we'll talk about the game and come back to this..." but he said no and thanked her before he moved in to kiss her. Kiliiiiiiggggg!!! :L

I can't get over the adoring way he was looking at her. So sweet. And I can't stop smiling because of this. :D

Mood Music: L.O.V.E. by Nat King Cole

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of broken roads and northern stars

I had my iTunes playing on shuffle last night while I was downloading music for J's iPod when this song came on. It's one of my favorites because the lyrics are reflective of how I felt before, and when, I finally found the man I would spend the rest of my life with. I'm also sure that those of you who've been down that same "broken road" will agree that it was indeed "blessed" as it was the same one that led you to the love of your life.

I set out on a narrow way, many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you

Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart, they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true

That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
Yes He did

I think about the years I spent, just passing through
I'd like to have the time I lost, and give it back to you
But you just smile and take my hand
You've been there, you understand
It's all part of a grander plan that is coming true

Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart, they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true

That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

But now I'm just rolling home into my lover's arms
This much I know is true

That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

*The video is the live original version from Rascal Flatts but there's also another version by Selah that's also beautiful to listen to.


Mood Music: Bless the Broken Road by Selah

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good morning!

If yesterday was crappy, today started on a beautiful note. 

Usually when my husband arrives from work, I'm still buried under the covers and it's Jeolo who jumps up to welcome him home. It's their hour of the day as I try to extend my snooze time by a few more minutes. This morning, I regained consciousness almost immediately after he came in because he surprised me with breakfast in bed (and I still can't get this silly grin off my face!). Okay, it was store-bought but he served my hot chocolate and club sandwich on freshly-toasted bread while I was in bed so it counts. It counts for a whole lot.

Isn't it wonderful how sometimes the simplest of gestures can mean the most? Needless to say, today has turned out to be a very good day. Thank you, Dada.

Mood Music: How Sweet It Is (To Be Loved By You) by James Taylor

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of real men

My mom used to tell me when I was younger that I'd be lucky to find a husband who would be as hands-on with our future kids as my father was. You see, she worked overseas most of my growing up years so it was my father who took care of my brother and I and later on, my youngest sister, too.

As a baby who suffered from colic, he would let me sleep on his tummy the entire night because it was the only way to relieve my discomfort. We had yayas now and then but he was the one who took us to and from school, prepared our baon, brought me to the salon for those school events when I needed to have my hair done or makeup applied and shopped for whatever outfits I needed each time. He was even the one who combed and tied my hair into pigtails because there was no one else to do it for me. And he made sandwiches and hotdogs on sticks and bought ice cream and cake to bring to our homerooms each time we celebrated our birthdays. He took care of us the way my mother would have if she had been home during those years.

Fortunately, I did get very lucky because J is as hands-on as my father was. He doesn't think twice about changing Jeolo's nappies, cleaning up his poop, giving him a bath, feeding him and playing with him. He sometimes has even more patience with our tot than I do. He puts our family's needs before his own and works very hard to give us a good life. We've only been married four years, and he's only been a dad for less than three, but he's a pro at it and I have no doubt that he'll be even more wonderful in the years to come.

To J, Jeolo's amazing Dada and my beloved better-half, and to my dearest Papang, HAPPY FATHER'S DAY! The world would be a much better place if there were more men like you in it.

Mood Music: Leader of the Band by Dan Fogelberg

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perfect fit

While going through my twitter timeline earlier today, I clicked on this link that Toni had tweeted and it led me to this tender and beautiful song that she'd posted on her wedding blog, Big Day Plunge. And I asked her if I could share it over here, too.

Strange how you know inside me
I measure the time and I stand amazed
Strange how I know inside you
My hand is outstretched toward the damp of the haze

And of course I forgive
I've seen how you live
Like a phoenix you rise from the ashes
You pick up the pieces
And the ghosts in the attic
They never quite leave
And of course I forgive
You've seen how I live
I've got darkness and fears to appease
My voices and analogies
Ambitions like ribbons
Worn bright on my sleeve

Strange how we know each other

Strange how I fit into you
There's a distance erased with the greatest of ease
Strange how you fit into me
A gentle warmth filling the deepest of needs

And with each passing day
The stories we say
Draw us tighter into our addiction
Confirm our conviction
That some kind of miracle
Passed on our heads
And how I am sure
Like never before
Of my reasons for defying reason
Embracing the seasons
We dance through the colors
Both followed and led

Strange how we fit each other

Strange how certain the journey
Time unfolds the petals
For our eyes to see
Strange how this journey's hurting
In ways we accept as part of fate's decree

So we just hold on fast
Acknowledge the past
As lessons exquisitely crafted
Painstakingly drafted
To carve us as instruments
That play the music of life
For we don't realize
Our faith in the prize
Unless it's been somehow elusive
How swiftly we choose it
The sacred simplicity
Of you at my side

Mood Music: Eric's Song by Vienna Teng

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falling slowly

I had to make a separate post for this song because it's so beautiful. It's my favorite from the film Once, which I gushed about previously, and I wanted to share it with you. Yes, I'm that crazy about it. 

This must be what falling in love sounds like.

I don't know you
But I want you
All the more for that
Words fall through me
And always fool me
And I can't react
And games that never amount
To more than they're meant
Will play themselves out

Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you have a choice
You've made it now

Falling slowly, eyes that know me
And I can't go back
Moods that take me and erase me
And I'm painted black
You have suffered enough
And warred with yourself
It's time that you won

Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you had a choice
You've made it now

Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you had a choice
You've made it now
Falling slowly sing your melody
I'll sing along

Mood Music: Falling Slowly by Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova

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a lesson from son to dad

This morning, we went to the Filipino market here in Riyadh to buy a few things and to allow Jeolo to ride the escalator in one of the buildings.

At the parking lot, J opened the door at the passenger's side to get Jeolo, who sat on my lap during our drive (with the seatbelt on, of course!), from me. Once he had the little boy, he started to slowly move away from the car while I was still gathering up my abaya so I wouldn't get the hem dirty and to prevent me from tripping on it as I got out. I was very surprised when my son refused to start walking with his dada but instead held out his hand to me and said, "Help mama." Awww... I have a gentlemen in the making! J laughed and expressed his chagrin.

I guess that goes to show that even a 33-month old tot can teach his father a thing or two on how to take care of his lady. *wink*


Mood Music: Treat Her Like A Lady by The Temptations

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a quiet moment

I'm sitting here in my son's play room with my laptop, a pack of crispy, spicy anchovies, a glass of ice cold diet Pepsi and music. I love moments like this, no matter how brief they are sometimes. It gives me time to bask in relative silence. 

Anyway, I also wanted to share another one of my favorite happy love songs. The lyrics are so beautiful in my humble opinion.

Thank You

by Led Zeppelin

If the sun refused to shine, I would still be loving you. 

When mountains crumble to the sea, there will still be you and me. 

Kind woman, I give you my all, kind woman, nothing more. 

Little drops of rain, whisper of the pain, 

tears of loves lost in the days gone by. 

My love is strong, with you there is no wrong, 

Together we shall go until we die, My, my, my. 

An inspiration is what you are to me, inspiration, look... see. 

And so today, my world it smiles, 

your hand in mine, we walk the miles, 

Thanks to you it will be done, 

for you to me are the only one. 

Happiness, no more be sad, happiness... I'm glad. 

If the sun refused to shine, I would still be loving you. 

When mountains crumble to the sea, there will still be you and me. 

Mood Music: Thank You by Led Zeppelin

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the thing about love

I just caught a rerun of the now-defunct show Men In Trees and I liked what Marin Frist, Anne Heche's character, said at the end of the episode:

“The truest thing I know about relationships is that sometimes, we don’t know anything at all. You can’t always get the one you want. And sometimes, the one you get, may not be the right one at all. But if you have hope, the universe has a funny way of showing you exactly what you need. The challenge is to let yourself be alone until the right one shows up. But you can’t hide either. Heartbreak sucks, but not having heartbreak sucks more. The answers aren’t in a lecture or a book, but maybe if you get yourself happy, you’ll find the right one. I believe this because against all odds, I’m still an optimist. That’s the thing about love, if it were that easy, everyone would have it.”

I still have a few friends out there who are still playing the relationship game, either by choice or by default. Some even post their relationship ups and downs on Facebook for all the world to see. I admit that I get irritated once in a while when these friends can't seem to snap out of a relationship that's obviously doomed and keep whining and dramatizing it ad nauseam. That may come across as insensitive but I was never one to just sit in a corner and wallow in my misery. Yes, it's sad and it hurts but that shouldn't stop you from living your life. You shouldn't be afraid of being alone because it's only when you're alone that love can find you again. If you're always jumping from one relationship, with someone who's not right for you, into another because you don't like being single, you might miss out on the one who is. Maybe you'll be too wrapped up in trying to make your existing relationship work that you won't notice him or maybe he won't notice you because he's not looking for someone who's attached. 

So, embrace being single. Pamper yourself, enjoy life with family and good friends and be happy. Love may surprise you yet.


Mood Music: The Rain Song by Led Zeppelin

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a realization...

Jeolo turned 10 months old yesterday. He now has 3 teeth (one lower and two upper and a fourth one beginning to erupt). He's started to babble continuously and calls his dad and me by papa/dada and mama/meemee, whichever comes out of his mouth first. :o) He speed crawls on all fours, pulls himself up with the help of a low table or the sofa, enjoys playing with toys that he can push or bang together, and is forever trying to pull and grab everything that he's not supposed to.

The fact that he's not that itty bitty baby anymore hit me when he smiled at me and I saw his halfway erupted two big front teeth. Gone are his toothless grins *sigh*. And here comes the biting!

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What is a Father?

I found this beautiful poem on From Reel to Field and thought it was perfect for J. He's turning out to be a wonderful dada to our son.


I Am A Father

I am a role model,

And an example of how to shape yourself.

I am a book,

And the lessons from which you'll learn to live.

I am a protector,

And your light to guide you through the dark.

I am a friend,

And the compassion to show you how to forgive.

I am a fan,

And your encouragement to be all that you strive to be.

I am a map,

And a guide down the path you'll need to walk

I am a breeze,

And the wings to carry you over any hurdle in your way.

I am a shoulder,

And an ear to bend whenever you simply need to talk.

I am a voice,

And the conscience to show you right from wrong.

I am a rock,

And the strength to help you pull your way through.

I am a hand,

And a lift to pick you up when you've fallen down.

I am a Father,

And an unwavering love that will always be here for you.

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY, Jeolo's Dada!

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moments

I was chatting with Je online yesterday evening and right before we said our goodbyes, I hinted about something to him. He didn't get it. It was about an on-going private joke that we shared but he was a little slow on the uptake last night. So I started sending him emoticons as clues to what I was trying to say. It turned into a guessing game of sorts as he tried to figure out the clues. After about 15 minutes, he finally got it. By that time, I had tears in my eyes from laughing so hard. He also laughed when he got the message at last.

Gawd... I miss him!

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